Mars + Venus III:
Simone’s Notes:
Redemption is a religious concept referring to forgiveness or absolution for past sins and protection from eternal damnation, generally through sacrifice. Redemption is common in many world religions and all Abrahamic Religions, especially in Christianity and Islam. In Christianity redemption is synonymous with salvation. It can also refer to being forgiven from being evil. However from the Christian point of view if we died the man we were born as we would die sinners and therefore be condemned to eternal separation from God. Therefore true redemption only comes when we are given absolution for our sins. Not being returned to some previous state of existence.
Confession time came for Edward again. It was inevitable. The guilt crept back into him again. It had taken over his mind once again. He just couldn’t think straight. There was only one way to cure that. Pretty soon, Edward found himself at Derdra’s door. He had come to know the route too well. Everyone would be sleeping now. Edward had timed everything down to a tee. He clapped his hands together at her door and placed his left hand at the door. An opening formed for him. Edward walked right on through.
The incubus walked through the apartment as if in a morgue. He felt so cold all over. Black surrounded the whole living room. Edward forced himself to keep walking. He felt like prisoner walking to the execution guards. Guilt ate at his very being. Better make this quick. Edward couldn’t afford to get caught. He was a key piece in the whole master plan. The alchemist made it right up to Derdra’s bedroom. He drew in a deep breath and opened the door.
Derdra lied asleep in her bed like an angel. A warm little smile came to Edward’s face. Sweet feisty little Nurse Derdra Carrie-Ann Chopin. She was his only key to redemption. Derdra had to stay pure at all costs. Even if the desire and hunger for blood tore at his very being. Speaking of which, the pain and craving shot up within him at the mere sight of his angel. Edward clinched his teeth tightly in pain. He shut his eyes tightly. The monster took in deep breaths. “No!” he thought fiercely. “I must keep Derdra pure for my sake! For her sake! For everyone’s sake!” Suddenly, Edward felt a little better. He walked over to his beloved. The alchemist knelt over her gently. He kissed her on the lips. A sense of relief filled his soul. Edward gave her another kiss. This time, Derdra slowly woke up.
When she opened her eyes, fear and longing filled them at the sight of Edward’s face. The nurse kissed him back quickly. Edward fell into surprise at the movement. Heat flowed between them in sparks. Then, it started up again. The old hunger in Edward’s soul. It just wouldn’t leave him at all. Such a beast came when unexpected. Derdra drew this out of him against his will. Each time it came out, Edward found the monster harder and harder to control. He found himself counting down to when he couldn’t control himself any longer and end up hurting Derdra. She was to kill him at that point. But lucky for them, that time hadn’t arrived yet. Still, Edward wanted to keep it that way. He pushed away from her quickly. Derdra sat up and looked at him. She could see the hurt in his eyes.
“You okay?” the nurse asked him. Edward shook his head at her once. Derdra looked at him closely.
“What’s wrong?” she asked. The monster rushed forward and grabbed her tightly. Tears formed in his eyes. Derdra waited in silence. Edward looked up at her again.
“Oh Dee!” he called out.” I am about to do something really terrible!” The nurse looked at him in a panic. Here it comes again. He always confessed something horrifying he did or what he was planning. She still couldn’t understand why Edward always felt the need to tell her these things. They both knew that it scared her practically to death. But still, he talked and she listened. The nurse swallowed at the silence.
“Okay,” she said in a trembling voice. “What are you plotting now?” Another pause came between them. Edward looked around for a bit. Then, he leaned in close to Derdra’s ear and whispered the latest soon-to-be sin to her. The nurse’s eyes grew big in fear. Edward slowly pulled back to look at her face. Derdra looked as pale as a sheet. She could even move at all. The alchemist felt bad for even parting his lips to her. He waved his hand in front of her face.
“Derdra,” the monster said. “Derdra.” The nurse didn’t respond. Edward sighed in misery. He had really done it this time. He may had scared her off this time. There wasn’t much he could do at the moment. So Edward shrugged at her and leaned in close to her ear again.
“Good night, my love,” he whispered to the nurse. Then, he kissed on the cheek and crawled off of the bed. He disappeared right into the night. Derdra just sat there alone in the dark. A new fear had crept into her very being. “Oh my god!” she thought. “He’s… a monster!” But yet, her heart ached for him still. She just saw a tormented soul within Edward. She suddenly began to understand it. She understood why Edward would come back to her night after night. “Edward wants my help!” she thought. But, Derdra couldn’t do it alone. She herself needed some back-up. And the nurse knew just the person to help you.
The next morning, Derdra found Winry in the dining hall. The blonde mechanic had been keeping low lately. She barely even talked about Edward at all since she learned about what he had become. She had shut that part of her life closed. Or so she believed… Derdra made her way over to Winry. The blonde mechanic looked up at her just as she was going to sit down to have breakfast.
“Oh Derdra!” she called. “I haven’t seen you in a while. What’s going on?” The nurse stood right in front of her. She had a serious look on her face. Winry detected that something was really wrong.
“Is… there something wrong?” she asked. The nurse looked around quickly. She leaned in close to the blonde mechanic. Winry did likewise.
“I want to ask you something,” Derdra whispered.
“Okay,” the mechanic replied. “What is it?”
“Do you still love Edward?” the nurse asked. Winry looked away bitterly at that question. Derdra noticed her face.
“Well,” she said. “Do you?” Winry didn’t answer. Right then, Derdra had her answer.
“Look me in the face and tell me you don’t love Edward,” she replied. A pause came between the girls. Winry kept her face to the side. She couldn’t deny it if she tried. Derdra breathed out some.
“I see,” the nurse replied. “Then, I have something to tell you.” Winry turned back to her right away.
“What is it?” she asked. Derdra went pale again. She leaned in close once more.
“Not here!” the nurse whispered quickly. Winry nodded at her.
“But where?” she asked. Derdra looked around for a safe place. She spotted the double glass doors near the exit. The nurse had known where those led too well. After all, Edward had shown her that way from time to time. That was their safe place to hide in when he really needed to talk to her. They could say anything they wanted and not be judged for it. She turned back to Winry.
“Follow me!” she whispered. The mechanic nodded again. Derdra took Winry by the hand and led her out through the doors and into the garden. They sat down on the stone bench in the center of the garden. There, Derdra broke down and told Winry everything from Edward’s nightly visits to his latest confession last night. To her surprise, the blonde mechanic listened in silence. She didn’t seem to have any emotion on her face at all. But yet, Derdra could see the sympathy for Edward in her eyes. Her heart too ached for the incubus alchemist and wanted to help him.
Above, Edward watched as Derdra told Winry the truth. One would think that he was being betrayed by his goddess and he was angry by her talking. But, no. He actually felt… relived. Derdra was just trying to help him after all. Then, an idea came into Edward’s warped mind. If Derdra played goddess in his mind, then Winry would be another high priestess of hers. So, Winry would be like Stacey. Only, Winry would be more respected than the pet ever was. A sick and twisted smile came onto his face at the new ideas. And just like that once again, the guilt faded away from his mind. He could finally move on and execute Manami’s vice-soaked plan for the sake and glory of the Fallen World.
