Mama and Daddy:

Simone’s Notes:

Family is a Western term used to have denote a domestic group of people, or a number of domestic groups linked through descent from a common ancestor, marriage or adoption. A family may be defined specifically as a group of people affiliated by consanguinity, affinity, and co-residence. Although the concept of consanguinity originally referred to relations by blood, many anthropologists argue that the notion of "blood" must be understood metaphorically; some argue that there are many non-Western societies where family is understood through other concepts rather than "blood"

On April thirteenth, the military was hit with their biggest challenge yet. They were caught off guard by this enemy and unprepared for them. They didn’t have the right methods or weapons to fight back. No one could’ve seen this coming. No, it wasn’t a foreign enemy. It was their parents!

Jim Vs. Mr. Lee

*This Morning*

“Where is the rosary I bought three years ago on our love vacation?” Jim asked aloud the next morning. He was looking all over in their bedroom.

“Under the bed, why?” Daisy answered in the kitchen.

“Your father is coming today!” her husband yelled out. His wife stopped washing dishes in the kitchen at that statement and marched straight down the hall to the bedroom. Jim had just crawled from under the bed with the rosary in his hands. He noticed the pestered scowl on her face.

*Present*

“I don’t understand it,” Mustang spoke up. Jim looked at him slightly confused.

“Don’t understand what?” he asked. The lieutenant general shrugged.

“Why would you need rosary for your father-in-law?” Roy asked. There was a silence at first. Jim shuttered at that question. The Northern men tried to keep from laughing. Mustang quickly noticed.

“What’s funny?” he asked. Jim shuttered again as he picked up his story.

*This Morning*

“What?” Jim asked his wife child-like.

“Very funny!” Daisy called out sarcastically. “He’s not a vampire!” Jim didn’t look convinced.

“But he’s evil!” her husband fought back. Daisy shook her head.

“No he’s not!” she said back. “Why do you hate me father so much?” Then, the door bell rang from down the hall. Jim looked extremely pale.

“It’s him!” he said in playful fear. Daisy rolled her eyes.

“You’re hopeless!” she said.

“But it’s true!” he yelled out. His wife just shook her head and went down the hall to answer the door.

*Present*

“So what’s wrong with your father-in-law?” Mustang asked again. Jim became nervous at that question. He looked at the other Northern boys as if seeking permission to speak. When nothing came, Jim unloaded.

“The man is Satan!” he blurted out. “He’s always hated me. He hated me when I was dating Daisy, he hated me when we got engaged, he hated me at the wedding, and he hates me now!” Mustang looked at him a little settled.

“He can’t be that bad, can he?” he asked.

“JAMES!!!!” a voice yelled out in the bar. All the guys looked up in a heartbeat. An old man was standing the doorway scowling at everything in sight. He was a proud veteran. The man had on his old army uniform. He smelt of old cigars and vodka. The old guy had a long black and brass cane with him. His face was like an old bulldog’s. Jim began to shy away.

“It’s him!” the lt. whispered in misery.

“JAMES!!!” the old man yelled again. “WHERE IN HELL ARE YOU?!?” He began looking around the bar. “I KNOW YOU’RE HERE!!! GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE NOW!!!” Mustang turned to Jim out pity.

“Is he always like this?” he asked the lt. Wright nodded in misery. Roy looked at him out of sympathy again. “Damn,” was all he said.

“I know!” Jim wailed out. The day was only going to get worse for him.

Nately Vs. Mrs. Reed

Nately paced around nervously. His mother had just arrived here. That meant only one thing. She would be asking him more questions about grandchildren. The woman was grandchild-obsessed. She wanted desperately to be a grandmother. So much that it drove her son insane. Introducing girlfriends to her was a nightmare. His mother would “grade” them on motherhood. It was just so embarrassing. But not this time! Nately was going to spare Kathleen the humiliation at all costs. Ha! Easier said than done!

“So, Nathaniel, do you have a girlfriend?” his mother asked as she was looking at the pictures he had on the bookshelf. That made the Lt. Col. freeze hard in his tracks. Here it was! The moment of trial. “Oh shit!” he thought. “Think fast, genius! Think!”

“Sort of!” he replied at last. His mother looked up at him.

“What do you mean sort of?” she asked. Nately thought about that for a moment.

Then he said, “She is my girlfriend, but she’s in an arranged marriage at this time and we decided not to try anymore until she was freed from her bastard fiancee.” Silence passed for a moment. Mrs. Reed thought about that little information for a moment. Then she smiled brightly. The Lt. Col. became sick to his stomach now. “Uh-oh!” he thought. “She’s plotting something! Now I’ve done it!” His mother hurried over to him and grabbed him by the hands.

“Let me help you break up their engagement!” she volunteered cheerfully. *Sweat drop on Nately’s head* “Okay! I wasn’t expecting this!” he thought. The Lt. Col. sighed hard. He was screwed now!

Don Vs. Mr. and Mrs. Mitchell

Nately wasn’t the only problem with parents. Don hadn’t told his mom and dad that he and Tamsin divorced last year. His parents didn’t really believe in divorce. How was he going to explain that he and Tamsin were no longer together he got back with his mistress whom he had a son with? It wasn’t going to be easy. But he couldn’t keep them in the dark much longer.

“Donald,” Mrs. Mitchell spoke up at the breakfast table. Their son looked up at them from his thoughts.

“Yes,” he said. His mom and dad were looking right at him waiting for him to talk. Don felt uneasy all over again. How could he start?

“You said that you had something to tell us,” his mother spoke again. “What is it? And where is Tamsin?” Don hesitated at first. It was now or never.

“About that,” the lt. began. “Tamsin and I split last year…” A dead silence fell on everyone. His mother kept her face. His father said nothing.

“Oh,” his mother said. “May I ask why?” Her son sat down at the table and began explaining in detail about she and him were unfaithful to each other, his affair with Jessie, and little Sammy’s birth. Don felt as if he was in a confessional. His parents sat there quietly the whole time. Don waited for them to interrupt him and criticize and lecture him. But they just sat there in silence. “Come on,” the lt. thought desperately. “Say something! Anything!” His father finally reached forward and touched him on the hand.

“My prayers have been answered!” he called out at last. Don looked at him confused.

“Huh?” he asked. “But I thought that you and mom didn’t believe in divorce!”

“We don’t!” the mother said. “But that woman was a shrew!”

“We kept praying that you would get a divorce!” his father went on. *Sweat drop on Don’s head* “I wasn’t expecting this!” he thought.

“As for your mistress,” his mother spoke up. Don froze at that one. “Oh crap!” he thought. “Here it comes!” He expected his mother to lecture him on pre-martial sex.

But instead she said, “Marry her soon and let us meet her.” Don was surprised by all of this. Was he dreaming? Were these even his parents? He didn’t know what to see. So he just nodded. They smiled kindly at him. But he didn’t rest that easily. His parents were plotting something, he just knew it!

Jacilyn vs. Mrs. Ray

Jaks and her mother were polar opposites. The head nurse was always bitchy and her mother was sweet and perky. Jaks never wanted to marry. Her mother wanted to be a grandmother. So you pretty much see where this was going when her mother met Havoc for the first time.

Jacilyn was just getting out of bed when it happened. She was woken up with laughter. “Huh?” she thought. “Who is up at this time of morning?” The head nurse slowly got out of bed, got dressed, and headed downstairs. She found Jean and her mother sitting on the couch talking. Jaks’s eyes grew big in shock. “Oh crap!” she thought. “She’s here!” What made things worse was that she was getting along with her current boyfriend. That would only lead to one thing…

“Mom!” Jacilyn cried out in shock. Both Jean and her mother looked up. Her mother smiled at her cheerfully.

“Jackie!” she chirped. “You’re finally up!” The head nurse froze at those words. “I hate when she calls me that!” she thought. Havoc smiled at her.

“Babe,” he said to his girlfriend. “Why didn’t you tell me about your mother?” Jaks looked at him shrugging. The mother smiled at her daughter happily.

“Jackie!” she called out again. “You never told me about this nice young man! And he’s pretty handsome too!” Havoc was blushing at those comments. “And have you force me to marry here? I don’t think so!” she thought. Her mother rose to her feet.

“Jackie,” she said. “Can I talk to you for a moment?”

“Uh…” the head nurse began to say. Her mother grabbed her by the arm and dragged her away to the kitchen. Havoc just kept watching. Both women disappeared around the corner. Jaks looked at her mother suspiciously.

“Okay!” she spoke up. “What is this all about mom? What are you doing here?” Her mother kept smiling at her.

“You always keep your boyfriends from me!” she answered. “You barely call me at all! So I have to pop in once in a while!” The head nurse sighed and rolled her eyes. Her mother kept smiling at her. Jaks became suspicious.

“What?” she asked. Her mother kept smiling. She leaned in close.

“So when’s the wedding?” the older woman asked in excitement. Jaks just rolled her eyes. “Never!” she wanted to say. But instead she just shrugged and shook her head.

“Oh!” her mother called. “We’ll have to work on that!” Jaks sighed at that. “I knew that was coming!” she thought. “Oh shit!” she thought.

Mike and Allison vs. Mr. Thomas

The past came back more brutal than ever. Mike’s father had come over for a visit. (It was a surprise really because he thought the army was of the devil.) The visit was anything but happy. Mike endured hours of lecture of sin and hell. Allison kept by the door listening. She was there for morale support. In the end, Mike walked out the living room looking depressed. Allison noticed his face.

“Mikey?” she asked in sweet pity. “What’s wrong?” The lt. col. didn’t answer her. He just kept walking out of the apartment. His girlfriend followed after him.

“Mike?” she asked again when she found him pounding on Andrew’s door.

“Andy!!!” he yelled out. “Open the door! I need the key to my chest!!!” Allison quickly grabbed him once she figured it out. The lt. col. tried to fight her off.

“Let me go Allison!!!” he yelled out. “I really do need this!” But the angel refused to do so. She kept holding him until he clammed back down again. They both sat down on the floor afterwards. Mike panted hard. Allison lightly put her hand on his shoulder.

“Relapse?” she asked. Mike nodded as he trembled.

“He is why I turned to my porn addiction!” he blurted out. “I am about to loose it again. I need something to get it all out again. And if I don’t get my hands on the key to my porn chest, I am about to go down to the bar and get myself wasted!” Allison felt great pity for her boyfriend again.

“You can’t let him get to you, Mikey!” she said to him. “You have to stand up and fight back. You have grown in so many ways. Even if he doesn’t see it, keep fighting the good fight. It’ll all be worth it in the end.” Mike looked at her desperately.

“You promise?” he asked. His girlfriend nodded sincerely. Mike just held her close to him. They stayed out for a few minutes later before going back inside to their apartment. The lt. col. was going to get all of the help he could get today.

Jean vs. Mr. and Mrs. Havoc

Jean and Jaks hid in the kitchen watching their mothers talk to each other in the living room. The lt.’s parents stopped by as well. He became as nervous as her. Both lovers just watched closely.

“They’ve gotten along well!” Havoc noticed.

“Too much!” Jaks pointed out. She was pretty worried. “Just great!” the head nurse mumbled under her breath. “Just great!” Jean looked at her confused.

“What do you mean?” he asked. His girlfriend turned to him worried.

“Our moms are getting along,” she answered in a strained voice. Jean still didn’t get it.

“So?” he asked.

“Don’t you see?” Jacilyn asked in a rush. “They’ll be good friends and then they’ll plot marry us off together!” Havoc slowly got the picture together.

“Why is that a problem?” he asked harmlessly. Jaks looked at him with disgusted shock. She loved Havoc, but she just didn’t want to get married. But she didn’t want to tell him that.

So she shrugged and said, “Never mind!” Then, she just walked back to their bedroom. Havoc didn’t really understand why she was upset for.

Riza vs. Esther

Jakob tried to get the two women he cared about to accept each other. But so far, that wasn’t happening at all. This morning, Riza and Esther were bickering with each other again. Esther just had to start it up again.

“You think you have my son wrapped around your little finger, don’t you?” she hissed. Riza looked at Jakob’s mother confused.

“What are you talking about?” the captain asked her.

“Don’t play dumb, bitch!” Esther snapped. “You aren’t going to take him away from me!”

“No one’s taking your son away from you!” Hawkeye shot back.

“Oh don’t try it with me!” the mother yelled.

“I don’t know what your problem is!” Riza barked back. “I keep trying to be nice to you, but you keep attacking me! What do you have against me?!?”

“You’re trying to turn Jakob against!” Esther shouted.

“No, I’m not!!!” Riza screamed. “Let go of that sick notion now!!!” This was always how they ended up with each other. Jakob watched safely from the kitchen. He just couldn’t figure out how to get the two women he cared about to just be nice to each other. But the mouse had to do something fast before a few changes would set in and set up life for the couple from then on. A few Esther wouldn’t agree with.